Sunday, September 20, 2009
today is first day of hari raya... many things happen....
1) a situation happened and its the same old situation happen 3 yrs back... 3 yrs back i made the decision to hold on and convinced the person that everything will work out fine and well and both of us can fight it thru.... everything going gd and we got our car and network but on 28feb09 both us had gave up the r/s... now same situation happen but diff guy but i made a diff decision this time round.. i chose not to convince the the person and respect the person decision.. and make my own decision.. regardless of what i always hope there is really a diff kind of malay in this society that wants to be successful in life.. but being successful is not by talking or not only monetary terms.. but also successful in r/s , in family and community.. i so afraid to love someone now is coz i more afraid to lose someone.. sometimes in life we have to learn how to let things go.. talking is easy... but to make it into actions its damm hard... its takes lots of courage and many decisions to had such an action...
what i said to you i hope u think abt it... reflect and move on with ur life.. my last chance to you was when i ask u at atm there.. after that i go up the bus i made up my mind.. like i had said i dont wish to force or convinced u anymore... i am very tired of it.. i have my way of thoughts.. hope we both move on and do what need to be done now, rather than just standing at a point whereby we dunno whats the future is all abt.. thanks for everything u done for me.. i will still continue to fight this career with u so long u want it and make it happen.. nobody can help u unless u help urself..u can still turn to me when u need help.. i will be glad to help you with whatever it takes..
2) my grandpa suddenly have fever and starts to hicups.. everyone so panic.. the moment i reach hm which is half and hr ago i keep monitoring his condition.. actually wanna bath and change and call up min to go drink.. but now so late le... actually i got alcohol at hm.. just feel like drinking at hm.. but tml got tuition at 11am.. everyday i worried my grandpa condition... faints...
3) was having blocked nose actually then i try blow out what its in my nose.. then suddenly my nose pain like kena punch like that then my whole forehead starts to pain also... soon i get dizzy which is now.. but trying to blog coz i dun wan disturb any sistas that is busy.. just feel like saying out every shitty thing thats happening..
4) i am no longer the jiayi that i am 3 yrs ago.. i need to change my thinking and my ways of handling things.. that includes my decision making.. dun ask me why i still single.. coz i simply dun wan a relationship to tie me down.. i need a career now.. i need time for myself.. i need to get back my own life.. hope all guys understand!!
she told
the story ...
8:55 AM
