tigger-baby

2jan2010-23feb1020

2010-02-23T12:14:00.000-08:00

the times we had spend tgt.. always memories.. i nv gonna forget u.. i will be strong to move on.. to get what i want.. face my dad prob.. i wan face it myself.. i dun wan to pull u in.. i cannot be selfish.. i know this day gonna come.. sooner or later.. wan to let u know i am serious with u.. luving u is the greatest thing happen in my life.. i let u go doesnt mean i dont luv u.. becox i luv u so much i dun wan hurt u.. i really need time to convince my dad.. and i must.. i really hope after i convince my dad i can get back to u.. do whatever it takes to have u.. u know i wan to see the future with u.. u know i cannot do without u.. ur shadow now is my strength to move on.. the things we gone thru i hope u remb.. wait for me plz.. i nv give up on u.. i still pin high hopes on u..

hope by that time i come back u see the change in me.. and what i done for u.. if i not serious with u i just put aside everything already.. not even convincing my dad.. that's all i can say.. l luv u.. more than anything else.. unconditional luv.. adawiyah luv wanrais.. thats my promise..

haPPi mood~

2010-02-21T14:49:00.000-08:00

praying every now and then ytd seems to help so much.. finally this thing is getting of my chest.. praying for the best n smooth path ahead.. seriously.. now i believe more and more in him and nobody but him.. he makes my life now soooo bright.. when its dark he make it bright again so that i could walk properly again..

last few days were the worst days for this yr i guess.. ytd get to see luv.. wanna thank god for that too.. he accompanied me n makes me strong again.. talk things out.. really feel so stupid n dumb since mj session till now.. heard 'i luv u' from his mouth again the feeling is soo contented.. when 3 days i dun heard from him i feel so uneasy n down... so used to hear this 3 words everyday.. suddenly dun get to hear.. the world seem crushing down on me.. but now n so far its ok already.. but asking myself when i get to hear this 3 words again..

adapting to this new change.. i hope adapt well n get used to it soon.. (:

t0ts of aDawIyah..

2010-02-19T11:52:00.000-08:00

many things happen recently..

some kind of arguement or debate or whatever u call it lah with luv... put in so much for this r/s i hope both of us cherished it.. i am so used to him that i realli dun wanna let this r/s go so easily.. so hard to find someone i realli luv.. i shud listen n heed jaslin advice.. dun always use breakup as a topic or issue to end problems with.. a gd r/s shud be sitting down n discuss whats the prob n solve it tgt.. haven seen luv since thurs 18feb 3.15pm till now 20feb 4.00am.. and still counting down.. will onli be meeting him on 21feb 4pm to go soccer with him.. realli mizing him so much.. wonder if he mizing me too.. but becoz his bro got into accident thats why we cant meet today and i understand that.. he very worried n sad over his bro accident.. he loves his bro soo much.. wanting to protect him soo much.. lets pray that his bro can have speedy recovery..

actually dint expect myself to luv him so much.. as days passed and time flies.. he can make me change to be better person n encourage me in so many things.. telling me my mistakes n make me felt luv again.. this few days i trying to adapt to new life n he knows that.. i hope this change that i made cud make us luv each other more.. at the same time miz each other more.. i enjoy being with him and i swear he is my one n only.. though he always assume or doubt me at times becoz of my playfulness.. but i know onli my actions can prove him that i realli serious abt him n this r/s.. i pray hard that god this time round is giving us the direction correctly n help us in whatever we are heading for.. i realli looking forward for the future..

going back sch soon on apr.. i have to cut down clubbing so that i wun be tired during the schling days.. planning for luv luv birthday too.. what surprise can i give to him? my sachok prince charming lehh.. hahaha..

2010 :)

2010-02-06T20:30:00.001-08:00

wahhhh... i know i kinda long dint blog.. heee.. sorry ah... busy with werk n bf.. yup that ritessss... have bf now.. but dint really blog lah.. sian of blogging.. last time is single then bo liao then blog.. now busy with werk also...

though sch is starting.. going for bridging course on apr n test on june, july starts sch.. its getting nearer and nearer... going back to sch le.. been like werking n playing for 1 yr sch grad from poly.. now need to step back into sch.. hope SIM is better than poly life... plus this time round got chantal study with me sehhhhh... we studying BSC BUSINESS!! weeeewuuuwittt... once finish n done we have our degree n off we go to further our careers!!!

time pass so fast lor.. all and all so many things happen 2009 and rite now 2010.. and i am turning 22.. numbers game! on my god.. soon 23 then 24... blah blah.. my god... faints... looking back at 18.. i found myself really doing things then 18 dun do.. now looking at myself at 22.. also doing things others dun do.. hahhaa.. think chantal noe what i mean..

this yr CNY falls on valentine day lehhhhh... hmmmm... what plansss huh.... really didnt expect this 2010-2014 i can spend valentine with sumone i luvvv.. finally after 'scanning' thru so many candidates!! i found 1 special one that cud get along.. clique.. laugh... cry... going thru up and downs.. encourage me to study too.. finally i found it... and daddy saw him too!!! after so many r/s i been thru this time round i am serious n will try ways n means to make it thru n work it out..

work

2009-11-09T04:15:00.000-08:00

wanna werk and werk right now.. dunno why.. haha :)

my stuffs

2009-11-03T07:45:00.000-08:00

sumtimes i wonder am i too gd or easy trust pple? luving someone is not just talk but lots of actions and commitments.. why say so nice things to get a person but after getting then fuck care her?

MAN: be responsible for your actions. everyone is looking at you for what you had done.. talk one thing and do another is not a gd habit at all..

WOMAN: dun trust man easily, coz they might be just playing ur heart.. dun put in so much efforts on a guy coz they will always take u for granted..

the memories i had i got to thank him for that.. treating me like princess and all.. but just short term... praying for him to find the ger that suits him.. coz simply i am just too complicated.. and too kind-hearted already..

going out with faiz now.. continue when i am back..

own spaces

2009-10-30T04:58:00.000-07:00

telling you hw i feel am i wrong? better than i keep mum and pull out it rite?

sometimes you need to ask yourself if you luv the ger whole-heartly anot? what you have been doing is right anot? treating her loyal and faithful anot? what you want from her did she ask for any returns anot?

if i feel something is not rite... something must have gone wrong...

if you wanna flirt or be playful outside.. dun expect ur gf to stay decent and loyal to u only also.. becox its unfair to her... why must she tahan all the nonsense when you get all the happy out there?

if right now you think she not the one you really wan or luv, plz dun hurt her anymore. she not born to give you hurt one.. what she need is tender loving care...

before both of you fall too deeply n get hurt... she rather pull out now and stop herself from getting hurt anymore.. if she is someone who has her limits, dont test her limits.. she dun like it though...

since you cannot make a decision.. as usual she make the decision for both of you..

MY HEART

2009-10-28T03:03:00.000-07:00

Bila kita mencintai yang lain
Mungkinkah hati ini akan tegar
Sebisa mungkin, tak akan pernah
Sayangku akan hilang...

If we love somebody
Could we be this strong
I will fight to win
Our love will conquer all
I wouldn't risk my love
Even just one night
Our love will stay in my heart
My heart...my heart...

nice luv song.. trying to memorize..

wonder where i stand now...? dont understand why to love someone is so hard? becox while loving somebody we get hurt too.. when times are bad we support one another... when times are gd we enjoy it tgt... do u still remb those times? looking back at ur blog with ur past posts.. makes me tear and laugh at the same time... u noe why?

lost of words too...

wish for the best

2009-10-22T03:10:00.000-07:00

there is no point to hang on to something that dont belongs to you...

why there is nobody for me to linger on...

i only ask for a guy to love me with all his heart...

why do i keep falling in love with the wrong man...

i am so tired of relationships...

just wanna shut my door and dont let anyone in to hurt me anymore...

i should go back who i used to be... stop showing affections to anyone...

be with my kakis and gfs... club... hang out... chill...

enjoy my life that way so that i will not be upset over man!!

i think i will make this decision.. and let him go.. let him do what he wants.. and not being bothered by it.. treat him like my kaki think its the best decision..

LOVEHURTZZ..

hold your dream

2009-10-12T12:39:00.000-07:00

sometimes being single or attached is not what i can choose or decide by myself.. it takes 2 hand to clap.

a song i am listening every now and then..

here's the link pple - http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UvE63aNKGW4

hold your dream - Naturi Naughton, Asher Book & Kay Panabaker - Fame 2009 OST

hold your dream
don't ever let it go
be yourself
and let the world take notice
you'll find strength
when people bring you down
they will see
if you would only
only... believe....

a dream that i hold on tight and nv let it go.. but my dream is not only abt myself..

breakdown

2009-10-07T23:46:00.001-07:00

i hate everything god arrange for me.... so much... just woke up and i realize... certain things are not what i want and looking for already...

boss miz call me and i call back... after a long conversation i break into tears.. making me feel like giving up suddenly... where is all my gers when i need to tell them abt work stuff?? everyone doing diff things now.. who is there to hear me out.. nobody already... come to think abt it.. i am all alone..

came back from clubbing ytd i call him.. tot he say he will be awake so that if anything happen to me he at least can help and know the situation.. although nth happen but he didnt pick up so i left him a sms.. i wait and call again all the way from 4am to 8.30am... in the end still no call.. so i make my last call swearing that if he not gonna pick up this call i never ever call him again.. maybe god hear my prayers and he did pick up.. but to my shockness what he reply me is he packing his stuff... at that point of time i dunno what to say or reply already.. i ask myself am i impt? am i stupid to fall in love again? am i really fated to love him? how i wish i met an accident and i really cannot be contacted again.. the things i do for him.. he knows himself the most.. dont need me to say.. he say he call me back.. what time then he call me back... i was aslp by then... in the end he left me a msg.. "im goin bck hm" that hurts me the most... looking back... i remb chantal once say to me... when guys haven get you.. you are everything to him... when u start to fall in love with him.. you are nth already... coz it is just a game... i really feel that this game just gonna end this way...

相遇第一次是偶然，第二次是必然，第三次是命中注定

我的快乐，会回来的。

加油，沈嘉仪！

ham ham died!!

2009-09-28T10:43:00.000-07:00

HAM HAM DIED TODAY......... :(

came hm and found my ham ham not moving...
cried and couldnt bear to let my ham ham go...
ah min came over my place to borrow kebaya and i told her this piece of news.. she is shocked also.. luckily she came and help me take away ham ham.. if not i am so lost coz i kol syaiful but he did not pick up at all.. told kadir and he ask me buy another one lor.. wth.... hmmm... so many memories with ham ham... so many chalets we been thru... so many ups and downs.. tears and joy... now he left this world before me.. i being left alone at home again with no companionship again.. i couldnt even slp tonight i guess although i am sooo tired..

before i got home i went to watch 'fame' with boss, alfian, syahrum, xingjun, jiabao... its a very nice dancing movie..! but after got hm saw my ham ham like that.. totally no mood again.. haiz.. think gonna go watch fated to love you...

love and miz my ham ham.. 03sept2008-28sept2009... r.i.p..

DECISION

2009-09-20T08:55:00.000-07:00

today is first day of hari raya... many things happen....

1) a situation happened and its the same old situation happen 3 yrs back... 3 yrs back i made the decision to hold on and convinced the person that everything will work out fine and well and both of us can fight it thru.... everything going gd and we got our car and network but on 28feb09 both us had gave up the r/s... now same situation happen but diff guy but i made a diff decision this time round.. i chose not to convince the the person and respect the person decision.. and make my own decision.. regardless of what i always hope there is really a diff kind of malay in this society that wants to be successful in life.. but being successful is not by talking or not only monetary terms.. but also successful in r/s , in family and community.. i so afraid to love someone now is coz i more afraid to lose someone.. sometimes in life we have to learn how to let things go.. talking is easy... but to make it into actions its damm hard... its takes lots of courage and many decisions to had such an action...

what i said to you i hope u think abt it... reflect and move on with ur life.. my last chance to you was when i ask u at atm there.. after that i go up the bus i made up my mind.. like i had said i dont wish to force or convinced u anymore... i am very tired of it.. i have my way of thoughts.. hope we both move on and do what need to be done now, rather than just standing at a point whereby we dunno whats the future is all abt.. thanks for everything u done for me.. i will still continue to fight this career with u so long u want it and make it happen.. nobody can help u unless u help urself..u can still turn to me when u need help.. i will be glad to help you with whatever it takes..

2) my grandpa suddenly have fever and starts to hicups.. everyone so panic.. the moment i reach hm which is half and hr ago i keep monitoring his condition.. actually wanna bath and change and call up min to go drink.. but now so late le... actually i got alcohol at hm.. just feel like drinking at hm.. but tml got tuition at 11am.. everyday i worried my grandpa condition... faints...

3) was having blocked nose actually then i try blow out what its in my nose.. then suddenly my nose pain like kena punch like that then my whole forehead starts to pain also... soon i get dizzy which is now.. but trying to blog coz i dun wan disturb any sistas that is busy.. just feel like saying out every shitty thing thats happening..

4) i am no longer the jiayi that i am 3 yrs ago.. i need to change my thinking and my ways of handling things.. that includes my decision making.. dun ask me why i still single.. coz i simply dun wan a relationship to tie me down.. i need a career now.. i need time for myself.. i need to get back my own life.. hope all guys understand!!

wat a nite

2009-09-15T14:01:00.000-07:00

hmmmmm...... couldnt fall aslp....

having cold chills and hot temp every now and then...

sick sick go away...

so... watching ming zhong zhu ding wo ai ni to kill time..

flu flu flu

2009-09-10T16:43:00.000-07:00

pengsss..

am having flu again.. stupid flu bug seems to be bugging me again... idiotic...

wanna slp also cannot.. nose like open tap.. using so much tissue paper.. sorry trees... so so sorry...

mizing all my baobeis... everyone so busy including me! diaozzz... kinda shagged... haha... but what to do... to achieve my dreams in 3 yrs.. i got to work double hard now... or even triple hard...

been slping on the floor this few days... find it kinda hard... coz my stupid bed spoiled and i got no chance to go ikea to get new bed even though its like 10mins walk from my house.. wth... and my fan like siao siao also.. wanna install aircon already.. cannot tahan sg weather.. its killing me!!

is the world gonna explode or what.. so damm hot.. i walk down to busstop only... perspire like as thou i go steam bath.. even faster than i step into steam bath n start perspiring leh...

and powerhouse also lor.. can they increase the number of aircons n fans?? its killing to just walk from entrance to dancefloor.. its packed n everyone perspiring too!! kinda miz hk n shenzhen life.. feel like leaving sg for a month again... hahha... enjoy shopping at hk and shenzhen.. especially clothings from hk..!!! i dun seems to like casual tops from sg fashion.. haha.. shit... am so into hk fashion clothes..

daddy birthday coming.. dunno what to plan for him.. bring him go dinner?? hmmm... wat to buy for him?? a dog?? woof woof.. haha.. he always wanted but he got no time for it... hahhaa... better not lata my ghim moh house becum zoo again..

looking forward for singyee birthday bbq.. been so long nv go bbq.. kinda miz it.. haha... and on her birthday its hari raya eve!! wheeeee... getting a black kebaya i think.. :) wonder how i look like in black kebaya... hmmmmm shall take many pics... and meeting up my malay frens wearing that!! haha

ehhhh... its like 8am in the morning.. and i cant fall aslp.. how sia!!??!!?? shit man...

what a life~

2009-09-08T16:03:00.000-07:00

been so long ago since i last blog... maybe nth much to blog... dun wanna blog neg stuffs... not too much of positive stuff too.. hahha...

hmmm... been going office almost everyday... kinda tiring but fulfiling.. looking at my fighters growing in numbers n strength... i pray that everyday they can have the motivation to fight...

also pray that the 4 single ladies enjoy our time now as SINGLE LADIES!! hahha... its time to enjoy!!! wahahha.. dun ask me why i so playful... maybe i last 3 yrs dun get to enjoy it thats why... hahah... gd n bad also lah....

rite now coping well with boss... respecting him as boss also... hope all of us fight our way thru n look forward for a bright future... :)

planning for year end chalet!! weeeeeeee....

a week of chionging!!

2009-08-28T11:40:00.000-07:00

fuyoooooo... TIRED...

FINALLY TODAY MANAGED TO REST AT HOME..

tml got to fight hard with syaiful.. tml he got 2 appts!! jiayou my fighter...!! he knows wat he wans and he is fighting for it... full support all the way...

this coming week he got 7 appts. *clapss* wheeeeeee....

when will my gers join me in this battle?? i am chionging front line for u gers n laoda.. hoping that u all follow... u all encourage me to go all out for it.. but whats holding u all back? i lose my laughter when i go office w/o u gers.. i miz u gers... so long never see u all too.. when will we get to meet up?? i wonder everyday before i slp.. although i am tired.. but i know i cannot dun do anything.. miz laoda gossips time too.. haha..

everyone seems attached and in relationship... am i too choosy or coz i haven settle my heart down.. am i expecting too much or pple standard too low... been asking myself for past 2 months since i came back sg.. what do i have..? what i wan..? what i am today..? where do i stand..? what i loves/likes..? what dreams awaiting for me to achieved..?

i am 21 already... in time to come i reach 22 then 25 then 30... time fliesss... soul searching for a period of time.. now i set my direction and am ready to step forward... what more can i ask for?? asking myself am i scared to go into relationship or am i really think that i wan to focus on career first...

someone treating me gd but am not prepared for it... someone whom i been contacting with but unsure of feelings... someone i know for yrsss but cant seem to work out now... still got more to come.. i am flooded with affections!! should i stop seeing all or let time heals everthing again...

a mixtures of feelings when blogging.. mood either happi nor sad.. whats happening to jiayi?? mizing my gers alot... hope to see them soon.. miz ya babes...

THANKSSSS TO ALL!

2009-08-22T12:04:00.000-07:00

all my frens n sistas n bros who attend my birthday celebration on fri at powerhouse, a big big hug n thank u to all... muackssss... this is the happiest birthday i ever had... fun n excitement... i hope everyone enjoy themselves too...

all my pics on fb already.. so wun load up here... pple enjoy from fb k... gonna slp soon.. my eyes seem to be closing real soon... tml is a better day!!! :)

LATEST UPDATE on my birthday plans!

2009-08-19T17:32:00.000-07:00

BIRTHDAY ON 21AUG!!

7PM meet sistas n gang for earle swensens dinner... wheeeeee....
9.30PM PARTY at st james powerhouse.....

those coming for just clubbing please be there by 9.30pm for free entry!! wahhaa... :)

meeting my PAPA tonight to have sakae sushi for dinner for my birthday.... wheeeeeee... sista min gg with me... :D happy sia... happy 21st birthday to myself... shall take many pics this yr!!

monday bluesssss

2009-08-10T05:04:00.000-07:00

rin-bao do this pic for me.... lets just admit she is damm pro in this!!

today monday... kinda bluesss... hahha.... just woke up like 1 hr ago... kinda knock out coz the day be4 nv slp... zzzzzz.. feel so hungry also.... wanna cook maggie.. nv long nv eat maggie... wahhaha...

looking forward for wed... serene birthday... am preparing to be dead drunk again! i think so lah.. if not i have to support rin sia... she down i cannot down... if not we slp outside dbl0 liao...

:):)

i shall go bath n eat coz hungry! bye pple..

CAN'T SLP

2009-08-03T14:34:00.000-07:00

hey all... am so sorry that i am just tooo lazy to start to blog eversince i come back sg till now which i think i only blog once..

many things happen for just 1 month.. plenty to say but too much to blog..

like i started clubbing n now kinda tired to club already... shall maintain like once a week will do.. super tiring to club 2 times a week already.. suddenly feel old.. n amazingly time flies n its august now.. kinda looking forward to celebrate birthday in a single status as i have not been doing so for like secondary sch till now for what i recall n remb.. hahhaa...

ah min found her soulmate... soo happy for her.. but i swear she really becum more cheerful n happy now.. i sincerely give her my blessings n prayers for that... pray that all things go smoothly n well n most imptly she is enjoying it....

get to open up my circle of frens n meeting more pple lately after my break up since march.. finally my family knows.. and so fast... fasting month is cuming.. and it falls one day before my birthday... faints... so fast lah... -_- but never the less.. i hope to practice it... am really serious to find someone to guild me n show me the way...

am also preparing for my birthday... not to let others worry for my birdy day.. i shall plan myself.. hahha.. nv celebrate at club before so i am gonna do that.. :) this yr at a club.. plz pple.. dun get me drunk! i swear i am no longer a gd drinker compare to last time... hahha.. so spare me.. we are there to enjoy... not kill each other.. hahhaa...

will be planning my time well to celebrate with diff pple.. so do keep in touch with me pple.. i will be giving each group ample time to celebrate.. as for my exact day i shall leave it to my 8 sistas if everyone could made it... wanna had earle swensens for my birthday... :) lets dress up n glamour... hahhaa... got myself a dress for birthday.. hehehe... am so excited to keep blabber non stop just on birthday topic..

as for status.. I M SINGLE. n stupid fb quiz keep saying i should get married by 21yrs-old.. kinda irritating thou but can plz let me find my guy first lah.. haven find married wat sai u tell me... hahah.. like i saying i am choosing n picky well.. will be meeting more guys for dates n know each other better n choose.. i believe in this way i know hu suit me most n maybe things work out?

am enjoying what i have now but i wanna do better.. oh god... i got a hard time slping thru the night.. like now? i slept at 2am coz damm tired but i am purely awake at 3.40am? shitty
lah... its like wth.. and this give me a feel to blog.. haha.. and do u know how i wake up?? i had this damm stupid dream that i am with another guy which i dunno hu on bed.. its like dot dot dot.. wat a weird dream for pass few months i am not really dreaming n suddenly i dreamt of such stuff... wth... and tell the truth.. i am hungry now.. feel like biting sumthing but its fat to eat at this time or call it breakfast... watever.. i feel so hungry!! oh god.. save me..

have been hanging out with zhen n rin this few weeks n now we 3 are down with flu, sorethroat n cough?? sickening virus not leaving us at all.. shoooo virus.. hate it.. been like eating all sorts of medz n drinking tons of water... i cant take sg weather.. kill me.. when i meet frens be4 sun set.. its killing enough... oh god..

and lame things happen recently... which i think entertained zhen n rin... like the 'wow, beautiful, i like!!!' oh god.. kill me.. laoda call me huan na now.. wat the.. plz... i dun look minas can.. i sooo chi looking.. pple still say i am looking like one ah liannn.. diaoz.. am gg for a new hair color n hairdo again.. shall shocked everyone including myself too..

blessings to johnny baby ger!!! i sick n cant attend but will visit when i fully recover.. she's completely cute n of coz completes both johnny n wife life now... :)

am talking too much i think... like one whole month of blogging i trying to cut it short squeeze into 1 post??? shall see when i can blog again out of no where n crapy..

simply a 'I MIZ U' sms makes me feel gd n brightens my day!!!

:):):):):):):):) smilezzzz my way thru my single life..

FEELINGS

2009-07-19T19:21:00.000-07:00

whats love man...????

i am still trying to figure out... whats my feeling right now... am i enjoying what i have now or am i yearning for more?

i need time to think whats the best for both...

coming sunday i am soooo looking forward to see u....

misssss ya....

going to LV!!

2009-06-15T11:46:00.000-07:00

me and zhennnn... lolx...

so long nv go LV walk liao... finally got chance... hahha... =) happy!!

preparing to club!!

2009-06-11T14:57:00.000-07:00

hmmm.. preparing to go clubbing at hk...

but am back from clubbing n the clubbing sux... will post more photos tml...

oinkssssss

I hate my brain!!

2009-06-08T11:52:00.000-07:00

been kinda emo last few days... going thru the hardest period of my life.. which is to forget someone... he told me that to forget him is to find a subsitute.... then izit fair for the sub...

makes me wanna leave everything aside and stop contacting people that reminds me of him..

but not strong enough to do that... trying to control my brain to stop thinking of him...i hope i can erase off all the moments we had.. single for 4 months... heartbroken forever... do you think he really feel guilty of it... envy of small edwin and jiayi... we both have same name but why our relationship end up so diff... how i wish my relationship can be as strong as hers....

i hate this feeling and it is unbearable... lovehurtz....

specssssss

2009-06-02T07:54:00.000-07:00

gotten a specssss.... quite style n common in hk right now...

last few days memories and today dinner!!

2009-05-31T09:05:00.000-07:00

hmmmm... 1 week plus nv blog... kind of lazy... then yuzhen blogging so i blog too... hahaha...

roy birthday pics... but is with yuzhen take de...

in the plane!!!

dinner with jes, weiling jie, fidia, jarrel, xiao edwin, yuzhen today!!!

the 3 of them.... =D

sad news... i forget where i placed my bedroom and drawer keys... aunt and uncle kind of angry with me... hmmm... me and my stupid little brain...

going home on sat!!

2009-05-21T11:04:00.000-07:00

i hate uuuuuuu....

this is what ans i get from you... after helping u so much... appt and partner... appt more impt...? if i am not impt then dun ask anything from me... i feel so stupid to mix love and feelings together... i know we not together anymore and yet i still ask u to fetch me... god... i am stupid... damm stupid... why am i still helping u... i asked myself... who am i to help u...

i know where i stand but i nv admit... laoda say i stubborn.. i am really stubborn... laoda say i demanding... i am really demanding... but thats my character.. i cannot erase the habit as easy as abc...

do u know how difficult to stop putting u in my tots... to stop saying ur name in front of everybody... DO U KNOW?

sux.. the feeling sux... more sux than anything else... u make me dont feel like going back now...

i dont wish to talk to u... coz i dun wan to beg u... and i dun wan ur pitiness on me... dun even want ur sympathy...

hate my life now... u happy then?

SUX

angels and demons!!!!!

2009-05-18T21:46:00.001-07:00

HEY first time i catch a movie overseas.... nooobbbb.... hahahhaa... but after all the cinemas is not as big as vivo and cineleisure ones.... thats for sure.... hahaha....

and guess who i watch with....??????

LAODA , JESAMINE, AH PEK AND MEEEEEEEE.....

hahaha... before that we had sushi meal.... yummmy....... nv so long sit down chit chat and eat and enjoy and watch movie... the show super gd... i love it so much.... and i am going to rome!!!! nobody can stop me!!!! weeeeeeeeeeee........... i love rome i love rome i love rome...

and great news ....... i going home on 23may!!!!!

vietnam & cambodia EXP.!!!

2009-05-17T06:58:00.000-07:00

am back from cambodia... my goodness... the country is sooooooo...... a very good experience because first of all the moment we touch down we looked like aliens n we talked like aliens... practically they nv see ger in their whole life if not they nv see fashion wear..... the way they stared is like once in a blue MOON a ger below 21 yr-old came to vietname and cambodia...... i dunno how to continue expressing the monsterours look from their face... but i will fill u all more if i see u all in sg....

and the number of motorbikes on road is sooooo much that everywhere is motorbikes..... ger or guy... young or old.... fat or slim.... ugly or chio or handsome.... alll got bikes!!!!!! faintss... like ant nest... all dark skinnn and look fierce.... we stay at the area best hotel... i nearly want to faint too... first the staff all cant speak english... can only fairly understand broken english... like talking to aficans.....hahahhahaha..... and the internet speed is 100 times slower than sg dial up.... trust me u feel like asking them might as well dont provide internet... coz no difference... this are some bad points..... gd point is the country no law like that... cross border stay in car 1..... hahahha.... they cant bothered to ask u get out and check... give money car already... hahahha...

well.... lots of experience in this cambodia trip... open up another side of a country culture to me... not a ideal place for shopping but a ideal place to dare urself to live in.... hahhahaa....

going back sg on 23may.... weeeeeeeeeeee......... slpy now... go oinkssssss first..........

take care folks.......

=D

MISS ME??

2009-05-11T11:07:00.000-07:00

to my dear viewers and friends.. miss me?? my noise?? my crap?? my companionship??

this few days been taking photos of myself.. let me post for all ur viewing..!!

LEE HUI MIN

2009-05-09T08:48:00.000-07:00

MS LEE WHERE ARE YOU????

are you busy with work and school... i try to catch ya online but always not able to catch u somehow.. miz you so much.. so worried abt you... will u be too tired!!??!!??

minminminminmin..... i inform my boss 7june i cfm going kl already... =)

BREAK UP

2009-05-03T00:57:00.000-07:00

TODAY I WATCHED A SHOW...

it ended that the guy ask for a breakup and cried saying that break up could let the ger lead a better life.. cried bitterly becox he could not give the ger a better future...

I hate this kind of break up... i hate that the guy ask for break up and cried in the end... telling the ger he is not the one and the ger can find someone better... so disappointed... why dont the guy be the one trying to improve and promise to give the ger a better future rather than saying or even letting the ger go...???

what the fuck is the relationship abt in the first place... is the ger demanding or the guy do not love the ger anymore?? what went wrong.....

ITS JUST ABT HOW I FEEL ABT THE SHOW... no hard meanings....

i want a stalk of blue rose... so long nv receive blue rose le.... am i hard to please????

flight back to singapore cancelled!

2009-05-02T01:46:00.001-07:00

hey all, i not going back on 5 may already... need to stay in hk after 20may then can decide...

sorry to trouble all my frens to bring my fav food over wor... =)

ah min where are you!!! no chance to talk to u this few days... where ya!!!!~~~~

BLOG!!

2009-04-29T10:22:00.000-07:00

so long nv blog le... hmmm

dunno what to blog le...

but now i healthy life.. swim everyday... =D

so da miz clubbing and chilling times...

dont feel like saying too much personal life so much.. dunno whose looking... dun wan give wrong signal... hahaha...

motivation of the day - slim slim down asap... oh 1 thing to remind myself need go bishan clinic the moment i reach singapore..

HAPPI!!! tentatively is go back sg on 5may.. dunno got any changes.. but i adapt to hk n sz le.. hahha... i buy 1 bolster ytd... weeee.... pink in color... hahhaa... hugzzzz... recently nth to hug kind of hard to slp... hahhaa... but now got bolster... anytime can fall aslp..

--LOVE--

2009-04-25T00:46:00.000-07:00

WHAT IS LOVE??

min wan find bf... but recently she emo.. i in hk... cannot pei her.. hope she can tahan until i come back..

home leh.. gong gong relaspe again.. haiz... hope my maid take gd care of him...

been busy dint got a chance to call home...

love love love... wtf is love... i dun understand... i nv nv understand it right from start... bf.. stead.. husband... listen already also feel its bull shit... i only know when i got feelings for someone i will show affections... which i dun care which is forever or not now.. though i always wanted to be a bride and i dunno i can still fulfil it when i am 25... haiz...

memories not meant to be forgotten... always keep in my heart...

what do i want now in a relationship... lost... totally lost... cannot give min advice too... coz my relationship is a failure too... sad...

min dont emo le lah.. if not i also emo leh...

yummy!!~~

2009-04-22T10:25:00.000-07:00

falling in love with maggie curry... la la la.. lol...

just cook curry today.... happy happy... hahaha... cook for everyone to eat... so homely feeling...

got myself 2 dress (269hkd=50sgd) and 2 t-shirts (130hkd=25sgd) and 1 shorts (75hkd=12sgd).

hahah good quality ones... weeee.... =)

anyway min say ham ham got wet butt and she bringing ham ham to vet tml... hope nth happen coz i will be damm down and sad if something happen... hmmmm.... i think coz i buy too gd food for him le... he enjoy like king... eat and eat...

MSN

2009-04-20T23:58:00.000-07:00

FINALLY MY MSN CAN BE USED!! HAPPI

BUT THAT ALSO MEANS I NOT BUYING MAC BOOK AIR!!!

NVM... SAVE MONEY AND BUY SOMETHING I LOVE!!!

ANYWAY I AM IN HK ALREADY.... LA LA LA...

flying off again on monday!!!

2009-04-16T05:29:00.000-07:00

hey peeps, i flying off on monday wor... hahhaa.... this time round flying myself alone!!! my god... but nvm... i get used to it REAL SOON!! no worries...

afterall i just worried for ham ham... hahaha... but i know min take gd care of him when i am away... lovessssss...... and i am taking bag orders now... i am a lady boss liao!!! hahahha

my aunt side order 2 bags and 1 wallet... lol...
lai lai order 1 bag....

lolx... i really should open a blog to sell bags...

MOVIE!!!

2009-04-14T12:24:00.000-07:00

WOW... nice movie that i watched today!!! FAST AND FURIOUS 4!!!

typical show that i love so much... espically dance dance show like dirty dancing 2... which i always like it soo much and dun mind watching it over and over again... a thousand timess....

soon leaving sg... going back china... aiming to slim another 2kg... hahhaha...

also had international buffet at meltz cafe with yuzhen and laoda... laoda ate lesser than me sia... hahaha... yuzhen ate the most... i middle middle... hahaha... but the food super nice... and atmosphere super gd, those in relationship can try out that place for dinner...

also wanna thanks to tigger for passing car to me at cineleisure today.. trouble u so much last few days too... thanks for ur companionship also...

hmmm.. ham ham so smelly... dirty ham ham... wanna bath him soon... =)

N|c3 wEEkEnd!!

2009-04-12T13:37:00.000-07:00

wah... very long nv blog... been enjoying myself this few days...

first... i got myself a diamond ring!!! lovesssss

second... got a hairdo and cosmetics... kinda changing myself n realize i slim down by 2kg in china!!

third... min birthday~~~ though min vomited after she reached hm and she dont seems to remb the whole process and during the process her fan spoiled coz she went to hug it and then dropped and spoiled... but afterall got a very big surprise from fer coz she came back sg!!!! and all of us was being shocked by 'edwin' story which was made up by ying!!!! its a long story though.. but we are so happy to see fer!!! *jaws dropped*

so this few days kind of enjoyable and cheerful ever since 28feb till now... i am looking forward for next few years... think back last 3 yrs really did not make myself in the best performance and shape.. catching it up now and hope i can use 3 months to get back what i have... everyone waiting to see me back to the jiayi 3 yrs back...!!! so exciting n challenging too!!!

finding buddy to watch too fast too furious 4!!! anyone just watched with me plz... =(

a pic i took while yuzhen sneak hm to change!!! kind of blur though... coz using iphone!!

MY HOME!!!

2009-04-07T11:35:00.000-07:00

finally after 3 weeks of work... i am back to singapore!!! MIZ home... and miz everything...

will post up the things i bought from shenzhen... hahaha.... going to slp...

slpy... =P

miz ham ham!!!!!

4 more days to singapore!!!

2009-04-03T02:11:00.000-07:00

hey all... if u all want anything please tell me now... coz i left with sunday to shop....

1)yuzhen: burberry scarf
2) ruiping: passport holder

eh.... money money money... come come come...

HERE IS A VIDEO WHICH I SUDDENLY LIKE!!! HAHAHA

my flight details on 7apr

2009-04-02T06:09:00.000-07:00

SQ 865 leaving HK airport at 1830, reaching CHANGI AIRPORT at 2210. terminal unknown must check when reach airport.

=D

show u all one LV wallet i bought here at 100rmb - purple color one.. wahahha... those who want please tell me and i can get for u all... charge at S$20!!

EXCITED!!

2009-04-02T00:55:00.000-07:00

time passed so fast.... soon i will be going back sg... hmmm... if u asked me.. i really learn alot in china... so much... appreciate it alot and many thanks to mr rick...

butterflies in my stomach this few days.... hehehe... dunno why... =)

1 aPriL 2009

2009-04-01T04:18:00.000-07:00

happy april fool's people!!! though i got nth to fool u all.. but today went back to shenzhen myself.. took ferry and i tell u all... the sea is so rough that i nearly vomitted in the ferry but luckily i able to tahan until reach the port.. worst still.. the port is full need wait 10mins to get the ferry parked and the ferry move with the damm waves!!!

today feel much better than 2 days back because went shopping to make myself happy... bought lots of clothings and belts and stockings and foods... hehehehe.. i miz my sisters and family and singapore food.... miz supper with them and suddenly wanna go clubbing... wahahha... i have planned 8apr to go clubbing.... had jio ruth, min, yuzhen.... who else wanna go????? love R&B nights.. can anybody suggest where is good?? can tag in my blog... hehehehe...

any guys want tag along with us is ok too... hahahah... like kadir or richard... eh... cannot think of any else... hahahha...

gers tell me what u want... i can buy so many things here as long as i have cash... fake branded is like everywhere and good quality... wahhahaha.... bought 3 dvd... slumdog millionaire, ip mun and bedtime stories... weeeee..... though 2 i watched before but can keep still... hahahaha... maybe faiz need ip mun to show his guys... if u wan can ask from me.. i did request for eng subtittles for u... hahaha...

and... planning for make over session with hui min for her personal birthday present.. but haven make appt for that my god... hahahhaa.... oppz.... hope min like it... its her first time!! i wearing white dress for the make over.... wahahha tell u before hand... so u can go prepare urself... hhahha...

here are some pics from macau...

mango pudding & birdnest & mango ice-cream from 'HUI LAO SAI'

RUI PING on venetian hotel rm bed!!! beautiful???

me in ferry!!! going to vomit then take pics... hahha

ALONE WALKING ON THE STREETS...

2009-03-30T11:05:00.001-07:00

never expect myself to be on the streets alone again... i went to hk myself... walk from mrt to office myself... so many flash back... i nv walk on hk street alone.... today... i walk alone... crying as i walk... thinking back.. just few months back things were not like today...

this is not what i want but i got no choice... then why he got a chance to chose between his reasons and me... i dont understand... after hk went macau... haiz.... second time i come i came alone too... i carry my tears with me... how i wish i nv had this process 3yrs back so that today i am not so disappointed and heart broken.... i NV so heart broken till such a stage that i myself got to hold on to my pride and live on to fight for what i want without sharing it with someone i truly love...

till now i dont bear to throw anything away... not a single item... why last time r/s i can throw away without feelings but now i cant.. can anyone tell me the difference...

why u give up so easily now...then why 3 yrs back when u chose to give up and then let me hold u back... why now i was not given any chance to hold u back...

i am sorry people for the emo(s) i been having.... memories keep me thinking back... if i dont say here i keep crying non stop while i type now...

BECAUSE OF YOU.....

posting pic soon =)))

2009-03-28T09:03:00.000-07:00

eh... din take pictures of myself.. took surrounding pics instead...

will post up by tml then... hahhahaha... pan is who anyway??? pang bao hui??? or who???\

and hor... i nv bring cam only brought hp... haha... so pictures might be blur for sure...

hmmmm.... busy whole day... finally can go out tml... haha... SHOPPING!!!

BUSY DAY****

2009-03-26T10:19:00.000-07:00

my god.... busy day today... tml going to view apartments coz going to move soon!! current place too small!!! =)

shenzhen is getting so cold.. help i got no sweater.. i cant eat.. i cant slp... i become god liao..

haiz..

suddenly realise i can adapt any place fast?????? now i am single and alone... with no commitments and only myself to take care and think of...

think back... why i step into a realtionship that i thought that i can see the future?? i am disappointed of myself because the reason is unbearable....

i become to love myself more... love to make up... dress up... but what i want from this... to find new love or what? i am doing for myself but i am expecting for something... is this good or bad...

to let time heal everything i got a sudden urge not to go back singapore but i cant... i dunno what to say to family... they dint know i single now.. if they know they will be so upset.. and worried for me... i keep to myself for now... but for how long... to make so many people worried i felt regretful...

now... looking forward... everyone helping me to get over the wound.. but a wound will always leave a scar... everywhere is memories... and to my point of view memories mean to be kept and not forgotten... dont tell me u forget everything because u just lying to yourself.. like you say... you dont want to tear when think of me so i chose to carry the tears with me... so that u can smile... the tears i hide i nv want to say and because nobody wants to see me like that... get it over and done with... easy to say.. hard to do... mentally killing me to overcome it...

looking for mask now!!

call or sms me via china number

2009-03-24T22:53:00.000-07:00

TO ALL MY FRENZ,

my singapore number not in use so dont flood my sg lines.... i am in china right now and only can make calls in china but u all can call me or sms me.. i can still receive!!

my number is +86 15979125342

thanks and love!!!

HAMSTERS!!

2009-03-24T02:46:00.000-07:00

few hours back i was telling min i miz ham ham, and cutie min took video of him and post in her blog... when i saw the video i tear a while... flashing memories thru my brain.... i hope ham ham still remb me... and wun bite me coz min say ham ham bite her mum... so sorry... i apologised for ham ham...

though ham ham is naughty but he is very tamed... he loves to be touched and play with... and he is not that hyper active when u carry him... hahaha... most imptly he will not get car sick and he loves taking car rides... hahahah...

going 华强北 to shop for electronics... hahaha... hmmmm so will be offline soon... see ya frens!!

alone in apartment now!!

2009-03-23T12:17:00.000-07:00

what a miracle!!!

NORMALLY... i dont dare to be alone at my singapore home, not even slp alone too... but when i reach shenzhen... a suddenly growth in me... suddenly i dare to do things alone and by myself... nv have such a courage before to stay alone... in an 3-rm apartment at 35 floor all by myself!!!!

life is full of ups and downs... but who are the ones that walk pass such times with you...??

有些事要自己做，有些路要自己走，有些祸要自己扛。

这是我要走的路，我爱走的路，我该走的路。

boring life today ~~!!

2009-03-22T10:24:00.000-07:00

haiz... today kind of abit sian... and slpy coz ytd slp at morning 7am... hmmm...

suddenly i tot i feel empty and easy but why some things keep appearing in my mind..

why cant god let me feel better when i am in china...

why the images appear so often...

what does that means??

anyway i finally got a china number... +86 15979125342

but here the prepaid card abit sux coz cannot call international calls or sms...

down leh... everyday in msn only to get in touched with frenz in singapore...

i just washed clothes... got to go hang it to dry... tml onwards i will be alone in sz... hmmm...

what will life be?

SHENZHEN!! =P

2009-03-21T03:30:00.000-07:00

wellll.... finally got a chance to update... hahhaa... i just came back today 3pm from spa which starts from ytd 1am... my godness... the spa here is powerfull.... it like 3 level spa... the resting area got dining and cushion sofas... like 200 sofas that big... with multi facilities.... pool table, computers, movie theater, tv, fruits counter.. so many things... cannot finish... everyone can try shenzhen... i bring u to spa... hahah tempted?????

now i know why shenzhen is man's heaven.... everything also have.... woman... spa... ktv... food... whatever u wan you will get....

=D

GRADUATED ~~~~~~ =D

2009-03-20T00:58:00.000-07:00

FINALLY.... i graduated from NP... yeah... so happy... hmmmm... weeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee..... cannot explain the happiness in me!!

preparing to go shenzhen now... hehehe... take care everybody...

3000 HKD SUSHI MEAL?!?!?

2009-03-19T10:12:00.000-07:00

WAH...!! 3000HKD SUSHI MEAL... EAT BEFORE?????

my gosh... i just reach apartment... i just came back from a sushi meal that cost 3000 hkd... and most imptly we cant finish and got to bring back and eat!!! only 7 pax but the food for 14pax.... and the sashimi is 5times bigger than sgp sashimi size!!! can u imagine???

of coz i nv forget i am on diet... hahaha i eat a bit nia... so now still full and cant slp!! faintz...

wondering what all my dear frens doing? anybody mizing me now? haha...

iN H0nG kOnG n0w!!

2009-03-18T23:53:00.000-07:00

Finally i reached hk already... first of all i wan thanks nigel and chantal for sending me and laoda off to airport... *many incidents happen and lets just keep in our tiny brain and not talk abt it*.....

hmmmm... dunno why i think of blogging maybe because its a place for me to communicate with all my sisters and frens while i am overseas... so kind of fun too... and this is a new chapter of my life... many things happen for the pass 2 weeks... learning to be more independent and strong... i know everyone hope i am able to get over and search for a new goal in life...

yes i am going to change for the better... anyways... my hkd number is +852 90243134.. in case there is important things can call me or sms me...

talking about goals...
1) get myself slim down min. 6kg 1 month... from 2mar till now i am down by 4kg already... wahahha....
2) earn at least 3k so that i can save 1k... invest in clothes and makeover 1k.. bills and food 1k...
3) get my lappie battery replace.. =) coz my batt living on ac always now!!
4) help laoda settle all admin issues!!

even one day... i am missing some people and stuff... like my ham ham.. nv hear his running i kind of cannot slp... i miz min coz i know we cannot dun hang out... hahhaa... and i miz my bed and my tiggerss... dunnno my maid got keep them clean... haha.. i miz chantal too coz i feel like going gym again!! hahaha... also keep thinking of my wf.... dunno why i so worried abt her leh.. chantal help me take care of her... motivate her... there is also people i miz which i dun wanna say... keep it in my heart... if the people can feel means without my words they know i been thinking about them... haha...

frens and sisters... feel free to talk to me... hahah...